What to ask the Venue

As requested by the lovely Rosie, here is a guide for what to ask the venue. I pinched this from one of the forums on Weddings Online, as it's even more comprehensive than the one I got from a friend... A few questions are repeated and a few are not even required but here is the full list I got off the website all related to the venue...


General Tips >>> What to ask the Venue Manager
-When will we need to provide final guest numbers?
-What is the minimum number required for the Ballroom, and are children included in this number?
-How many staff will be provided on the day - waiting and bar?
-Is there a smoking area off the ballroom?
-Is there a choice of table shapes, I.e. round, square.
-How many can each table seat - how many tables are there?
-What table layout do you recommend?
-Will there be someone I can liaise with who will be there on the day?
-What are the arrangements for greeting guests as they arrive?
-Do you number the tables or do we?
-Can you play music during the meal - CD?
-Will a staff member handle this, or will we need to find someone?
-Is there a stand for the table plan?
-Can a member of staff act as 'toastmaster' - announcer for speeches, cake cutting etc?
-What is the payment schedule?
-Who will be supervising on the day of the wedding?
-What costs are incurred if the guest numbers change last minute?
-Is there flexibility on the cost of the bar extension?
-Is there a limit to the number of day and evening guests?
-Are there any noise restrictions, e.g. for the band?
-Are fireworks allowed (not necessarily required, just checking!)?
-Do you include the bridal suite free of charge?
-Do we get a free night on our 1^st year anniversary?
-Do we get a reduced rate for the night before the wedding?
-Is it possible to have hairdressers and makeup artists come to our room on morning of the wedding.
-How can we ensure that rooms are reserved for VIP guests only - does this require a deposit?
-Is there a room we can safely store gifts etc during the day (other than a bedroom)?
-Will you inform us if there is another wedding on the same day as ours?
Food, Drink etc
-When do we need to decide on the menu?
-When can we come in for a menu tasting?
-Is it free of charge, do we get a free night in the hotel for this menu tasting?
-Will we be able to meet and liaise with the chef occasionally?
-Can we provide some alcohol for the evening reception?
-How much would you charge per glass of champagne, if we wished to offer a glass to each guest?
-When does the bar open?
-What happens to un-used wine and champagne?
-How long will the evening buffet be out until it is cleared away?
- How much afters food do you advise for 100 day guests and no afters guests?
-What is the children's menu - how much is it?
-What is the vegetarian option, when do we need to let you know numbers of vegetarians?
-is there a charge for choice of main course?
- is it possible to have some other dish in case main dish is not liked (eg. Chicken dish if beef main silent choice?)
-Can you cater for anyone with a special diet i.e. gluten free etc?
-Is there a cheaper food option available for photographer/band etc?
-Do you have high chairs available? How many?
-Is service charge included in the price?
-Will we be able to sample the house wine and house champagne before we choose our drinks package
- Bar extension -How much and until what time?

Cake
- Does the hotel provide a cake stand and what type is it?
- Is there a cover for the stand? What colour is it?
- When is it cut? How much is cut?
- Does hotel provide a cake knife?
-When should the wedding cake be delivered, and where will it be stored?
- Can we use wedding cake as dessert?

Decorations
-Who is responsible for decorating the venue - when is the room available?
-Who will decorate the tables?
-Can we have tea-lights/candles on the tables?
-What chair covers can be provided?
-Would someone be able to collect the decorations after the event, and we will arrange to have them taken them home the following day?
-Do you have any restrictions on decorations?
-What is the china/glassware like?
-Is confetti allowed outside of the building?
-What flowers/decorations etc are provided?
-Do you provide flowers for the top table?
-Will there be linen table cloths and napkins?
-Will someone be able to collect any decorations that we've brought so that we can collect them at some point after the reception?

Table Plan
- How is it displayed?
- When do we need to let the hotel know the names & numbers of guests and seating plan

Timings
-How long should we allow for reception drinks, meal etc?
-What is the best time that the evening guests should arrive?
-At what time should the wedding cake be served?
-What time will you serve the evening buffet?
-How long will the meal take to be served?
-What time should we book band?
-What time does DJ have to end?
-What time is bar close at?
-What time is residents bar open until? Is there residents bar?

Guest Information
-What is the check-in/out time for overnight guests?
-How will people buy additional alcohol during the meal?
-Is there anywhere for guests to store coats, bags etc?
-Will there be someone on hand to arrange taxis for departing guests?
-What time is breakfast served in the morning?

Payment
-How much of a deposit is required
-Percentage required before/after the day (proforma invoice issued)
-Is the service charge included
-If they numbers are slightly out on the day will it still cost
-Method (Credit card/cheque/cash)?
-When does the balance need to be paid?

January. Yikes!

A friend gave me a bit of a shock at the weekend. She told me how many months (correction: how few) months we have left 'til our respective weddings. Quite the jolt I needed to get me into gear.

My witness is getting her own dress, and her hunt has begun in earnest. All sorts of colour options cropping up, with a little (welcome!) direction from my mum.

Future mother-in-law and my mum herself have started searching for outfits - and all being terribly polite to one another about colours and styles and "oh no dear, you go first" - it's all awfully nice.

Venue people are being a pain in the backside, but I won't get started on that because if I do I will just get annoyed. We chose a quiet restaurant for the party and since they got the deposit they have become...less than accommodating. Which is alarming, so we will not go into detail!

Have booked a DJ for the entire day, we will be toetapping from dinner until the wee small hours. The Handsome One and I are very much focussed on the word party in the phrase wedding party so hopefully everyone will enjoy themselves.

Just looking for invitations now, there are so many to choose from. Can't decide who to go for, although Lantz seem to be on everyone's list and I have heard some bad reviews, so unless they have the most amazing selection ever I might give them a miss. Something simple and hassle-free is all we're looking for. Another friend jokingly asked if I would like to see her brochure on Releasing Doves on the day. HA! Oh my god what will people think of next.

Coo. Coo. I will poo on you. Coo. Coo. Coo.

We have set up our meeting with the marriage registration people and will be getting that out of the way in the next couple of weeks. Will have to dig out a copy of my birth certificate (did you know they can go out of date?! Who knew! "Yes, I know I was born some time ago and I know I have a small piece of paper to prove it but as you can see it's out of date, so I must not really exist...oooh I'm a ghost...") - I asked my dad where mine might possibly be and he just burst out laughing. So yeah, getting a copy organised! By the way there IS a charge for getting a marriage licence, it costs frickin' €150 for them to rubber stamp us in 3 seconds and tell us we're good to go. Needs must I understand, but really? Just call it a wedding tax and be done with it!

We're looking into our Lune de Miel which is awfully exciting, we're thinking a city break or two and a week/ten days somewhere hot and boring with little to do but relax with new partner in crime. No longer will we be betrothed! Ha!

This seems like a long engagement doesn't it? But I quite like it...

Photographer is also booked, he seems quite nice. He's not big on staged photos but likes the idea of melting into the background and snapping away at people having a good time. Sounds perfect for the kind of day we're hoping to have. Still undecided about the video element.

We've looked at wedding rings, have some ideas on what's going to go where - might get mine made, which would be super fun. I can't believe the good value at getting exactly what you want if you just look hard enough... Thankfully The Handsome One is very easy to please on this front. Plain & simple is the key!

So I think that's all the main stuff really. We still have to look at flowers but I'm waiting for a sample of the dress material from Hilda which is taking a while. She assures me it'll be here soon...

Choices

So as you may have gathered, the dress choices for me were greatly narrowed by the selection and service in various shops over two/three months. It came down to Eden Bridal in Enniscorthy and Town Bride in Powerscourt. It's a pity I couldn't get the dress from Eden and the finish from Town because the finished work from Colm & the girls there looked just amazing. But, the dress in Eden won out overall and I will be handing Hilda a pile of cash early in 2010 when she delivers The Dress.

Massive relief to get that hurdle out of the way so that's three major things down now. Dress, ceremony venue, location for meal afterwards - all in the bag. Now to relax over the Christmas and then start worrying about invitations and little things in the new year. Unless of course the venue gets flooded or something in which case...I'm eloping.

Diet. Ugh.

Skiet
Day one - still a pleasant enough person - will keep you updated, hehe

This diet involves low-GI food, no junk or booze for a week or two in order to kick-start the weight reduction, and an increase of exercise. I only work out twice a week at the moment so I'm upping that to four times a week and just trying to eat more sensibly. I'm aware that if I cut out too much I'll only start to lose muscle mass in addition to flabby-pounds, so I'm staying conscious of my protein intake. Just making sure it's not in the form of burgers and/or cheese ;) hehe. I'm also aware that if I'm too draconian I will lose interest, come off the regime (which is meant to be a life-change but seriously...I love good food) and pile all that weight back on again.

Please don't judge me, it's not just because I'm getting married next year that I'm doing this. I've lost a stone over the last 12 months and having a day out to plan for is giving me the nudge to lose the other stone. I'm sorry I don't know what that is in kilo's off the top of my head...


In other news...
We may have found our venue, spotted a rather nice place over the weekend, very relaxed and flexible, didn't make you think that they churn out weddings like they're on a conveyor belt at the weekend, very nice indeed. It's a restaurant with a big garden, so - place for large tent attached to kitchen. Bingo... Date we want isn't free so we may just change our date. Our at-ease flexibility was met with much-relieved smiles by staff member who showed us around.

In the news...

A lot of people are talking about where to get married now that more & more people are becoming disillusioned with the church.

It was on Today FM last week for example - questions on where you can get married on a Saturday, if not in a church? We are all wondering how long it will take before the registry offices are open at weekends.

Ironically of all the weddings I'm going to this & next year, the ones in churhces are all on Thursdays & Fridays, while muggins here was hoping for a Saturday but really wasn't pushed on the whole clergy thing.

Thought: can I go into a Church of Ireland church and say that I am of no religion? If that was feasible then I wouldn't have to ask permission to marry the man of my dreams, from some man in a frock who doesn't know me from Eve. In order to gain said permission I would normally have had to lie, promising to raise currently non-existent children in a church which has long lost my respect.

Don't get me wrong, I believe in God. I just don't believe in the RC Church. For me there is a huge difference.

For now I'm just wondering, like everyone else, when the opening hours for non-church weddings will change. For the moment it looks like we'll have to settle for an official day & a white-dress day. Unless we go to his church and I don't have to lie to do it.

Hold the Phone

Well look at that now.

There's a book that's not total madness.

Georgina Campbell's Ireland for Romantic Weddings is actually very good.

It goes through all the counties of our little island one by one, listing what she thinks are the cats pyjamas both up north and in the republic. She even breaks down the fatter chunks so there are a couple of cities in there by themselves.

What's nice about the book is that there are lots of visuals - images of interiors & exteriors to give you a better feel for each option. A lot of the websites I've been looking at just don't have enough visuals for me. I'm lazy, I don't really want to have to drive around the country - as we've already established, I'm just not into it enough!

Georgina also has a handy wee checklist at the end of each venue review where she ticks or crosses out the following complimentary items:

• Flowers & Candles on Tables
• Menu Cards
• Cake Stand & Knife
• Red carpet
• Champagne reception for bride & groom
• Tea/coffee reception for guests
• Accommodation for bride & groom

I have to say that's a pretty handy little list that I would not have thought to check myself. What with being clueless 'n' all.

She also has a good section at the beginning of the guide talking about all the important bits - notification of the state, marriage laws, civil ceremony options, religions. It's similar stuff to what I've been reading on all those websites I mentioned before, but it's nice to have it all on paper.

Finally the last bit of handiness is at the end of the book. It's like those deadly checklists you get in DK Travel Books (my all time favourite travel guides) - a magic matrix.

It gives you the crucials:

• Max & Min Numbers required
• Wheelchair Access
• Evening Guest Option
• Venue Hire Charge/none
• On-site accommodation
• And...whether it is a honeymoon location!
  

Other than the information overload, each venue is also reviewed in a succinct manner, there's no wishy-washiness to it, none of it too gushing - just nice and straightforward. It's also personal, clear that she has actually visited these places, not just reviewed them for the sake of a book. You never know with guidebooks...

All in all, a good read. One that won't freak you out ;)

Who knew there were so many choices?

Wedding types.

From eloping, through going abroad with a select few and throwing a party afterwards, to having a small gathering at home, to travelling across the country to a big castle or something, to going to a nice restaurant, to renting a big house somewhere and getting a marquee in their garden coz you just don't have one big enough yourself, to going to a hotel with or without marquee, to a simple registry office. Oh yes, and then whether to have the church wedding (which church?!) or a registrar in a hotel or... So many choices, so little enthusiasm for any. I really am missing that gene!

To be honest it's all a bit daunting. Others are getting far more excited about this than I am. Is that odd? I would much prefer a relaxed celebration, no fuss, no stressing about flowers or favors or what class of bubbly or how many bridesmaids/groomsmen to have. Too much focus on the wedding and not enough focus on that thing called a marriage I think.

Pic from weddingpath.co.uk