I'm Fine

This has become my new phrase of choice

I'm fine

As most men know, this is a complete lie.  As most wise men will know, you need to stay out of my way and stop bothering me when I use it more than 10 times in one conversation. 

When I say stay out of my way and stop bothering me, I mean only speak to me to tell me things you have done and ticked off the list.  Do not sit there doing nothing, wait for me to ask gently if x, y or z has been maybe, you know, completed...?  Pretty please?  And then scowl at me as if I'm the biggest cow on the planet because I asked you about something you haven't done.  It's not my fault you haven't done it, nor is it my fault that you said you would do it 2 weeks ago.  And now that time is running out, all the millions of tiny little things that would have taken you 2 seconds to do at the time, are now piling up into this big mess of TO DO lists.  Plural. 

You Twat.

Be prepared for unexplainable bouts of tears at quiet moments when nobody can see or hear you.  Because you really didn't sign up for this and no matter how much you put a smile on and get on with it for the important people in your life, you can't help feeling unbelievably frustrated because no matter what you do things keep getting frayed at the edges or worse still, keep falling apart. 

Deep breaths, big smile, pop that twinkle back in your eye and keep going.  You're nearly there.