Wedding Stress

Strange...

The only people who are not getting cranky about the weddings coming up are, in fact eh, those of us getting hitched!

Thank goodness for that, eh?

As for the rest? "Have you got your flowers yet? Have you got your DJ yet? Have you got your shoes yet? Have you lost enough weight, it doesn't look like it... Have you confirmed your invitations yet? Have you negotiated the overnight rate with your venue yet? Have you got a list of taxi companies from there to the local guesthouses yet? Have you spoken to the organist yet? Have you got the car yet? Have you..."

Do people not realise how ANNOYING IT IS TO KEEP ASKING the same questions over and over and over again? I'm a good project manager, I have a fricking to-do list, I'll get to it when I fricking get to it!

Listen - if I have news, I'll share it with you. IF I feel like it. If I feel your contribution would be welcome in some way. If I'm bored out of my tree and I have NOTHING MORE INTERESTING TO TALK ABOUT!

There is so much more going on in the world that is SO MUCH more interesting than fricking buttonholes. I'll button your hole if you keep it up.

*sigh*

I wish I could say that to some people, I really, really do.

THIS is why I didn't want a wedding. The amount of stress it involves for people who - let's face it - just aren't up to it. All the people I'm surrounding myself with - good friends, lovely cousins - all perfectly content to have the occasional wedding-conversation but - most importantly - go back to normal chats directly afterwards. I love them. It's the other folk (who I've been trying to avoid and I think it's making things worse) that are driving me up the walls. I even like talking about the weather more than church music and flowers. But there's rugby, there's Easter, there's Paddy's Day, there's friends' birthdays, there's family business, there's work, there's being-there-for-people, there's even the banking crisis and general political disasters to discuss, not just wedding favours and what colour bows go on the invitations. I just don't care! Give me a pretty invite that will get people to where the party is. That's all we need for crying out loud!

I'm so sorry if this rant seems out of place grating. I've absolutely had it with people creating fuss out of nothing. Yes I know I've a lot on at the moment but I'm not about to stop focusing on the dayjob so that I can work on one day in my life.

It will be a magical day, regardless of how many flowers you can fit in a vase on a table which sits 8 people.

Wedding Stamps

When doing up invitations we'll include an SAE in each one...

Which can be completed with specific wedding stamps from An Post...

Which last year were nice - just a picture of 2 entwined gold wedding bands.

The 2010 ones are different!

You can buy them online direct from An Post in a little booklet, they don't cost any more than a regular stamp - 55c each...

Turning it up a notch

Picking invitations - found 2 very similar invites from 2 different companies. Prices are a mile apart - for the convenience factor. 1/3 price = DIY jobbie. Thing is, I'm not the artiest craftiest person on the planet... Wonder if I can cut the ready-to-post chap's price in half... Hmmm...

Have made decision on wedding rings, ordering them tomorrow.

Make-Up & Hair Trials this weekend.

Wish people would get off my case trying to get other stuff done like buy shoes and underwear. Go away please, I will do all of these annoying things when I get to them. Now sod off. I refuse to stress about the little things.

I have such nice friends though. Ordering me to have a hen party and taking it on themselves to organise one. So kind... I'm very lucky :)

Honeymoon

Irish Summer Time is a shit time to go on holidays if you're going far away.

Hurricanes, winter time, monsoon season. That's all I'm hearing these days.

Note to self: if getting married again, make sure you look into honeymoons BEFORE you choose your date. BEFORE. Much better idea. DUH!

That is all.

What to ask the Venue

As requested by the lovely Rosie, here is a guide for what to ask the venue. I pinched this from one of the forums on Weddings Online, as it's even more comprehensive than the one I got from a friend... A few questions are repeated and a few are not even required but here is the full list I got off the website all related to the venue...


General Tips >>> What to ask the Venue Manager
-When will we need to provide final guest numbers?
-What is the minimum number required for the Ballroom, and are children included in this number?
-How many staff will be provided on the day - waiting and bar?
-Is there a smoking area off the ballroom?
-Is there a choice of table shapes, I.e. round, square.
-How many can each table seat - how many tables are there?
-What table layout do you recommend?
-Will there be someone I can liaise with who will be there on the day?
-What are the arrangements for greeting guests as they arrive?
-Do you number the tables or do we?
-Can you play music during the meal - CD?
-Will a staff member handle this, or will we need to find someone?
-Is there a stand for the table plan?
-Can a member of staff act as 'toastmaster' - announcer for speeches, cake cutting etc?
-What is the payment schedule?
-Who will be supervising on the day of the wedding?
-What costs are incurred if the guest numbers change last minute?
-Is there flexibility on the cost of the bar extension?
-Is there a limit to the number of day and evening guests?
-Are there any noise restrictions, e.g. for the band?
-Are fireworks allowed (not necessarily required, just checking!)?
-Do you include the bridal suite free of charge?
-Do we get a free night on our 1^st year anniversary?
-Do we get a reduced rate for the night before the wedding?
-Is it possible to have hairdressers and makeup artists come to our room on morning of the wedding.
-How can we ensure that rooms are reserved for VIP guests only - does this require a deposit?
-Is there a room we can safely store gifts etc during the day (other than a bedroom)?
-Will you inform us if there is another wedding on the same day as ours?
Food, Drink etc
-When do we need to decide on the menu?
-When can we come in for a menu tasting?
-Is it free of charge, do we get a free night in the hotel for this menu tasting?
-Will we be able to meet and liaise with the chef occasionally?
-Can we provide some alcohol for the evening reception?
-How much would you charge per glass of champagne, if we wished to offer a glass to each guest?
-When does the bar open?
-What happens to un-used wine and champagne?
-How long will the evening buffet be out until it is cleared away?
- How much afters food do you advise for 100 day guests and no afters guests?
-What is the children's menu - how much is it?
-What is the vegetarian option, when do we need to let you know numbers of vegetarians?
-is there a charge for choice of main course?
- is it possible to have some other dish in case main dish is not liked (eg. Chicken dish if beef main silent choice?)
-Can you cater for anyone with a special diet i.e. gluten free etc?
-Is there a cheaper food option available for photographer/band etc?
-Do you have high chairs available? How many?
-Is service charge included in the price?
-Will we be able to sample the house wine and house champagne before we choose our drinks package
- Bar extension -How much and until what time?

Cake
- Does the hotel provide a cake stand and what type is it?
- Is there a cover for the stand? What colour is it?
- When is it cut? How much is cut?
- Does hotel provide a cake knife?
-When should the wedding cake be delivered, and where will it be stored?
- Can we use wedding cake as dessert?

Decorations
-Who is responsible for decorating the venue - when is the room available?
-Who will decorate the tables?
-Can we have tea-lights/candles on the tables?
-What chair covers can be provided?
-Would someone be able to collect the decorations after the event, and we will arrange to have them taken them home the following day?
-Do you have any restrictions on decorations?
-What is the china/glassware like?
-Is confetti allowed outside of the building?
-What flowers/decorations etc are provided?
-Do you provide flowers for the top table?
-Will there be linen table cloths and napkins?
-Will someone be able to collect any decorations that we've brought so that we can collect them at some point after the reception?

Table Plan
- How is it displayed?
- When do we need to let the hotel know the names & numbers of guests and seating plan

Timings
-How long should we allow for reception drinks, meal etc?
-What is the best time that the evening guests should arrive?
-At what time should the wedding cake be served?
-What time will you serve the evening buffet?
-How long will the meal take to be served?
-What time should we book band?
-What time does DJ have to end?
-What time is bar close at?
-What time is residents bar open until? Is there residents bar?

Guest Information
-What is the check-in/out time for overnight guests?
-How will people buy additional alcohol during the meal?
-Is there anywhere for guests to store coats, bags etc?
-Will there be someone on hand to arrange taxis for departing guests?
-What time is breakfast served in the morning?

Payment
-How much of a deposit is required
-Percentage required before/after the day (proforma invoice issued)
-Is the service charge included
-If they numbers are slightly out on the day will it still cost
-Method (Credit card/cheque/cash)?
-When does the balance need to be paid?

Getting there

With a few months to go we have firmed up on a few things...

Hair trial and make-up trials have been booked for the end of February.

We have met with the Registrar and now are officially Licenced To Wed.

Introduced sets of parents to the celebrant.

Far-away family members have booked flights.

We are running through some pre-marriage stuff soon, it's so funny the questions they ask. I must say, it took The Handsome One a while to figure out how to answer some of the more relationshippy questions. I had read them ages ago and had time to think about all the areas covered, so when it came to answering I was a bit more ok with things. I think the experience will bring us closer - it has happened to other couples we know so I'm sure it'll happen to us too. Makes sense; if the experience so far is anything to go by ;)

We have been to see the venue to ask them All The Questions. I got a big list of What To Ask from a good friend who got hitched last year. I think it must be like the beacon of the B2B - when it's another friend's turn I will pass the torch. We had to give the venue a bit of an ass-kicking actually. We're fairly laid back people but they gave us some thunderingly bad customer service before Christmas and hadn't improved since. No deposit receipt, no copy of the contract sent... There were other details but I won't go into them. Hence our need to visit! The Handsome One - who is usually wonderfully reserved - calmly sat them down and told them he hoped that would be the end of the poor service. I was so chuffed when he did that, I had packed my angry eyes going in there and just had to sit and watch him be the man. What a guy...

Have since heard that our back-up venue (I'm a nerd, I have to have a plan B!) is in financial difficulty so I really fricking hope we're not going to have to pop a marquee in St Stephen's Green for the shindig!

In other news... The photographer and car bits are researched and booked, the music is 90% booked for the whole day and now my next hurdle is the invitations.

Picking the stationary is the easy bit here folks, it's what to write on the damn thing that's causing the hiccoughs. See, we ain't sure about the setup for the day. We have an idea what we'd like but there's nobody to guide us on this. So we're hesitant to make a wrong turn here. We'll figure it out of course, it's not rocket science. It's just a little more difficult that I would have expected. Hurrumph.

I'm looking forward to choosing the cake. I like cake.

Wedding Candles

Oh my god.

Wedding candles with your mug on it.

YUK!

That is all.